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Breaux Vineyards, Drink Local, Early Mountain Vineyards, Keswick Vineyards, Kid Friendly Wineries, Mermaid Winery, Tarara Winery, Virginia Wine, Virginia Wine Blog, Wine
Not So Kid Friendly Wineries, Pink Boa Wearing Bachelorettes, and the Mermaid Winery High Chair Kerfuffle
Finally. It’s done. The Election. The day after — known to many in the middle as Liberation from Hypocrisy and Mud Slinging Day. Whew.
I have trouble remembering the days before many of my friends polluted Facebook and Twitter with their partisan political pontifications. Since so few others call my home phone, I wondered this morning over my bowl of steel cut oats (allegedly one daily serving of this stuff will improve cholesterol) if I would miss the eight to ten robocalls each evening to let me know that Governor Romney or President Obama is lying and will destroy this country, the world, and even the galaxy. And, without all the political junk mail reminding me that Governor Romney or President Obama will be saving or ruining the world, I wonder what I will read with my morning intake of cholesterol-reducing oats. Guess its back to The Atlantic and NYT for me.
For readers outside North America I offer the following for context: Here in the U.S., election season turns our friends — who otherwise appear sane the rest of the year — into partisan, hypocritical crazies that lose their ability to critically think, enthusiastically slopping up any cutesy talking point or statistic that supports their distorted, one-sided narrative and shines a positive light on their candidate of choice, all the while lusting for any piece of news that depicts the other candidate negatively.
“I never consider a difference of opinion in politics, in religion, in philosophy, as cause for withdrawing from a friend.” ~ Thomas Jefferson
The crazies I speak of are easily identified with a quick skim of your Facebook News Feed — many are still at it a couple days removed from Election Day.
In the spirit of the season, I too would like to get in on all this opinion sharing action. In sticking with the theme of this blog, I won’t be sharing any myopic political rants. Instead, I’ll keep it to wine and share a topic that is near and dear to me, and one that evenly splits my wine friends — bringing children to wineries, or, wineries that prohibit small humans from entering their sacred grounds.
I feel the need to clarify what I mean by bringing kids to wineries. Like most sensible parents, we want to be welcomed at wineries — with our kid in tow — to enjoy an afternoon with a glass of wine and conversation with friends, or to attend a winery event. I do not mean, brining the kids to a winery so they will have a place to run around like little hellions while mom and dad get hammered.
Before our family expanded last May, my wife and I were regulars on the Virginia wine trail, roaming the routes along the rolling hills of central and northern, Virginia, once or twice a month. And, because of my work travel schedule we were able to visit the Sonoma/Napa area of California a couple times a year.
As every parent knows, a baby does change everything and the first thing to go is non-essential activities like spending long afternoons on a winery patio, taking in vineyard views, sipping a glass of wine while chatting with friends. The days of roaming the routes along the rolling hills of Virginia wine country once or twice a month are over for a while — well, at least until Kinley is safely out of the meltdown and random loud squealing stage.
I personally have no problem with my little angel’s meltdowns or squealing, but realize others may not be as fond of her expressions of emotion, especially in a place like a winery where people tend to go to relax and enjoy a glass of wine.
Toddler tantrums are the primary reason many of my wine friends cite for not wanting children allowed at wineries. Many of the wineries that I’ve encountered that do not allow children also cite the same potential disruptive factor.
I get that, but submit that more peaceful afternoons at wineries have been disrupted by roving herds (pun intended) of pink-boa-wearing bachelorettes than any type of rowdiness caused by children.
Of the roughly 200 wineries/cellar doors/tasting rooms that I’ve visited — in seven countries and about a ten states here in the US — I can count on a couple of fingers the times I have witnessed a screaming baby or unruly child running around a winery unsupervised terrorizing patrons. I have however, on dozens of occasions, had a peaceful and relaxing winery visit interrupted by disorderly bachelorette parties.
Though I am not a fan of the boisterous bachelorette parties, I do feel these folks have a right, as do children, to freely visit wineries. Not surprisingly, many winery staffers loathe the bachelorette parties but allow them (to disturb everyone else) because, well, they spend money.
There are of course some wineries that try to limit the number of bachelorette parties by not allowing groups over 4 or 6 people and prohibiting buses and limos on their property. I’m not aware of any winery that has directly prohibited bachelorette parties, but there are wineries that have taken a more direct approach with children.
Chateau O’Brien at Northpoint in Northern, Virginia is one such winery that does not allow children on premises. Brian Kirby, author of The Other 46 blog (on Twitter: @TheOther46) wrote a piece in February 2009 on Chateau O’Brien’s new (at that time) policy limiting access to the winery only to visitors 21 years of age or older.
In their newsletter, Chateau O’Brien cites the truest interest in the safety of children and the associated liability issues as the reason for their decision. Eye roll. My first reaction to their ‘numerous liability issues that influenced this decision’ cop out is to call BS. However, since I have never invested one penny of my own money in funding a winery operation, have never devoted even one drop of sweaty equity to running a winery, and have no clue about matters of insuring such an enterprise, I put the ‘ol BS card away.
I respect the O’Brien’s right to operate their winery the way they feel is best for their family. I hold the belief that small businesses like Chateau O’Brien are the growth engines of our economy and entrepreneurs like Mr. O’Brien that take risks by investing their capital and sweat equity to start a business, should be able to write the rules of their operations.
Though I respect the O’Brien’s right to operate their winery any way they choose, I am also keen on exercising my rights of choice — which in this case means not supporting wineries like Chateau O’Brien that have policies I do not like. For this reason, I will never visit Chateau O’Brien while their no-kids policy is in effect, I will never purchase their wines, and I will never include their winery in a list of wineries to visit in Virginia (which I receive many such requests for).
I should note that I have not visited Chateau O’Brien to personally to test enforcement of their no kids on premises policy, but I assume this policy is enforced given all the liability concerns. If any readers are aware of a policy change allowing children at Chateau O’Brien, I will gladly amend the aforementioned.
For wine enthusiasts out and about in Virginia wine country looking for a winery where there is no chance of being accosted by a rambunctious toddler, Chateau O’Brien may be a good choice for you.
Other wineries are subtler than Chateau O’Brien in their not-so-kid-friendly approach. Take Mermaid Winery — which bills itself as Virginia’s first urban winery — in the Ghent section of Norfolk, Virginia. Just a few weeks ago my wife and I decided to revisit Mermaid to take advantage of their burger and glass of wine for $10 special.
Though the burger and wine were great, our decision to visit Mermaid turned out to be one of more frustrating dining decisions we’ve made in a while.
My entry to Mermaid Winery went something like this… I walk in to the winery with my baby daughter on my hip and was greeted by a lady behind the bar, “Can I help you with something?”
Me: “Yes, we would like eat outside on the patio.”
Lady behind the bar: “The hostess will help you” giving a head nod toward the young lady standing at little counter adjacent to the front door.
Hostess lady: “How many?”
Me: “Two and a highchair.”
Hostess lady: “We don’t have highchairs…” followed by a squinty-eyed look of incredulity as if to say… ‘O to the M to the G, these suburbanites have dared travel outside the city limits of soccermomdom to be amongst the sophisticated and enlightened folk of the commune of Ghent with their tiny human spawn in tow, who will no doubt be running around like a little hellion terrorizing all of our valuable sophisticated customers.’
Since my wife frowns on public displays of dissatisfaction, I firmly clinched my tongue between by top and bottom incisors, and followed the young lady out to the patio to where my wife had the foresight to sit her suburbanite ass at an empty table since several other parties (likely sophisticated Ghent DINKS) were arriving.
Though I kept my mouth shut, I wanted to ask the nice lady how the hell they could not have a highchair or a booster seat considering Mermaid Winery is more of a restaurant than a winery at this point. No doubt, such a question would have been lost on her. Oh well, they are now on my list!
Kinley on patio at Mermaid Winery. Stand and eat little human…
Still at Mermaid Winery… Kinley searching amongst the vines for a high chair. I’m happy to report that this toddler harassed no Mermaid Winery patrons on this particular visit.
For wine enthusiasts in the Tidewater area that have children, I would recommend the hour drive east, across the Chesapeake Bay Bridge tunnel to visit Chatham Vineyards or Holly Grove Winery on the Eastern Shore. If you are in search of a local winery, Mermaid is your only choice. I recommend you consider piling the kids in the minivan — invite the neighbors kids too (the more the better) — and setting your GPS to Mermaid Winery in Norfolk. Please be sure to tell them Frank sent you! 🙂
Chateau O’Brien and Mermaid Winery are not alone in the not-so-kid-friendly category. According to the online Virginia winery guide maintained by the Marketing Office of the Virginia Wine Board, just 117 of Virginia’s ~229 wineries are designated as Child Friendly. Pfff!
Some of my favorite kid friendly Virginia wineries are: Breaux Vineyards (on Twitter: @BreauxVineyards), Keswick Vineyards (on Twitter: @KeswickVineyard), Early Mountain Vineyards (on Twitter: @EarlyMountain), and Tarara Winery (on Twitter: @TararaWinery). Please check the VirginiaWine.org list for a complete list of kid friendly wineries.
Wineries — please share your thoughts on why you do/do not allow children on premises. If you do allow children or encourage family outings at our winery, please share any challenges associated with allowing kids (reports of terrorized patrons, injuries, etc.)?
Consumers and wine blogging friends — I would appreciate your thoughts on this subject. Do you feel bachelorette parties are more disruptive than children that you’ve encountered at wineries?
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This is probably the most controversial subject for Virginia wineries. I also do believe it is more of a Virginia winery issue then it is wineries across the globe. Is there a right answer, no, not in my opinion.
We are labelled as child friendly, but I would say we are “sort of” child friendly. We are more then happy to have people visit with their children, but we don’t off any children’s activities and we require that children are at their parents side at all times. At a winery there are several places for children to get hurt and damage things. We are full of glass bottles, glasses, barrels and if ever in the cave there is drain grates, valves, etc. Many wineries also have cork screws flying around like crazy. That all said, i don’t think children are the problem per se, parents are. I am someone who runs a winery, loves to visit wineries and loves to spend time with my son. That said, my boy is, well, a boy. He loves to run about and get into anything he can and will have no problem knocking over a beautiful display of wine bottles. For that reason, I don’t think he is great to take to wineries, or even many restaurants at this point. Every child is different and it is up to the parent to be the judge of whether their child is suitable in certain places. Unfortunately some parents are better judges then others. We have had many well behaved children come in, but we have also had our share of children that do create issues for our customers and will wreak some havoc on their surroundings.
One of my favorite times was when a child was running around the tasting room and took someones keys off the tasting bar and put them into a barrel through the bung hole. Anyone who has worked with a barrel before knows it is easy to get things in, but not out. I did find it funny in a strange way that a child took away some adults keys as they were drinking, but the humor wore off when we had to jig saw the barrel in half to get the keys out.
Really there are disruptive people of all ages though. Bachelorette parties are not also all bad. Many times they are some of the most enthusiastic wine consumers and are our best customers of the day. Other times they are not. Really you have to try to be a good judge of character as to where to do your tasting with them. If they arrive with genitalia lollipops roped to their neck then they likely will be best helped in a more private tasting area away from your wine buyers.
We have had customers not return or even quit our Vine Club based on children, but we have also had people join and keep coming back because their children are allowed and have threatened to quit if we change our policy. Which way would really work best for pleasing the most amount of people, I have no idea and hence have stayed status quo on this subject so far. We have had just as many issues with drunk 60 year old men, rowdy 40 year old guys reuniting, Mom’s clubs, etc as we have with children and bachlorette parties. The only way to stop all issues and liability it simply to choose a different career path. We make alcohol for a living, therefore it is not always appropriate for under age people, and it will also cause problems with it clouding the judgement of someone who may normally be far better a person.
In conclusion to this very long comment, I do not condemn any wineries decisions on who they allow in to their winery. Honestly, I do wish that I was comfortable enough really evaluating these choices more but quite frankly i don’t and can’t turn away customers. I want everyone to be able to taste our wine and we have to balance the issues around that and try to work in the best processes we can to allow such. That said, I would not personally put off a winery that won;t allow my son. Their winery is likely equipped only for adults and has customers that appreciate that. Heck, sometimes I appreciate that. At a winery you are always under a liability microscope given the nature of what we produce, and yes, if some child gets hurt because of some drunk adult on your property you will go down harder as you should. It is really just up to each individual to decide what level of liability they are comfortable with.
That all said, it should be clear before you arrive and you should always treat everyone with respect which in one case it seems like you were not. At that point i would have an issue and not bite my tongue.
G’day Jordan. Apologies on the delay in replying… the 14 hour time difference is a tad difficult to keep up. I appreciate your insights on this post. Agree that this is a controversial subject for Virginia wineries, but few discuss it (at least with me).
Agree completely with your point here; “i don’t think children are the problem per se, parents are…” Yep. Unfortunately some parents (some are friends of mine) believe their children running around a public place disturbing others is just their own cute way of expressing themselves. These folks amaze me as they never seem to consider that others do not find their little angels so cute when they are running around being little hellions.
Ok, so I’ve never seen a 60 year old drunk man at a winery but I will keep my eyes open.
Cheers!
I have rarely encountered a bachelorette party on my adventures, but when I have they’ve been “placed” in a high volume area or room so they haven’t been an issue for me. First let me say I do love kids, BUT when it comes to the tasting room, I’d prefer a grown-ups only scene; and should be kids there I’d like advance notice. Those cute toddlers are unpredictable, some are good, but some are not. Same with the pets, I prefer vineyards to let you know if there will be pets or not; some are great with strangers others cause a riot.
Thanks for stopping by to comment Julie! If you rarely encountered a bachelorette party(ies) on the wine trail, you are a lucky one. I have a hard time remembering encountering a normal, subdued bachelorette party… they are always so boisterous when I encounter them.
Since most wineries don’t know kids will be there until they show up, I’m not sure how wineries would give you advance notice of children being there? Maybe install big flashing neon signs at the front entrance — ‘Kids or Bachelorettes on Premises’ ? hehe.
Definitely agreed on the pets. Hope to cross paths out on the wine trail at some point — Cheers!
I’m not aware of any wineries here in BC that outright ban kids, but once, when I was working at a tasting room, I had to politely ask some parents to take their baby outside, as…let’s say…the bouquet of the babe was not conducive to the tasting experience, and they did not seem to care. I equated it with asking a parent to take a screaming child out of live theatre so that other patrons could enjoy themselves. If the parent can’t figure that out, staff should make a polite suggestion.
Enjoyed reading your post, as always!
As a wine lover newly arrived on the parenting scene, I have become much more interested in this topic ;). Stephen and I, on his rare days off, love spending time relaxing at a local winery with our daughter in tow. If a winery did not allow children, we would not be going there. Not to make a statement so much as because when we do have a day to spend together, we want to do so as a family.
The fact that the owners of our winery also have children is probably why we never even considered NOT being family-friendly. We have coloring sheets and lawn games available for kids to play with and often do child friendly events. We understand that on your days off, you want to be with your family. Our tasting room is rather small, so people visiting with children most often choose to do their tastings outside on the patio or in the courtyard or picnic area, therefore we’ve never had any problems that I am aware of. (Side note- we try to put the bachelorette parties outside too.)
Our wine pourers are great about trying to make sure everyone enjoys themselves, and if someone was disturbed by children (or pets or bachelorette parties), we hope that they will let us know at the time so that we can accommodate them better. We have several different areas that we can pour tastings at, so we should always be able to find a nice quiet spot if asked!
We love bringing our daughter to wineries and have not encountered anyone being rude about it so far, but I would certainly have a hard time biting my tongue if they did! We spend many weekends up at Keswick- Aria loves it there and so far the other patrons there have always seemed happy to see her (of course, if she starts screaming we’re fortunate that we can take her across the property to my parents house to visit grandma and grandpa, lol). We’ve also found Castle Hill, Albemarle Ciderworks, King Family, Early Mountain and Trump winery to be very child friendly :).
My husband and I live in Loudoun County and enjoy going to wineries on the weekends to picnic, listen to a guitar player, and have a glass of wine. I’m sure we have frequented at least 3 dozen in VA in the last few years. After the birth of our daughter we visited a winery when she was about 6 weeks old – what can I say? I needed a drink. We have found that most wineries are super kid friendly and we appreciate that. However, we did visit Chateau O’Brien when she was about 3 months old and were shocked when they asked us to take our daughter, who was sleeping peacefully in her car seat, from the premises. So we did, along with the 6 friends that had accompanied us, leaving the winery to service its remaining 3 customers. With several wineries just down the road i figured it was their loss (8 non-napping/paying customers), not ours. I have never seen an unruly toddler or screaming infant during any of our visits that would warrant a no child policy so I am confident the large majority of wineries will continue to be kid friendly.
thank you for helping me find a place like Chateau O’Brien.